the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize