Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
Randomize
