i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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