"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
I cut my penus on the lid.
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
Randomize