oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Randomize
