fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
Randomize
