Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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