I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize
