dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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