i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
Randomize
