make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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