Well douche your snatch and let's go!
Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize