my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
Randomize
