3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
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