So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Randomize
