you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Randomize
