I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
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