he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Randomize
