If that was your dad, he is hot
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
Randomize
