I feel like I'm in dance class right now
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
I need to stop coming to work sober
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
