I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
Randomize
