All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
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