we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
Randomize
