so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
Randomize
