Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
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