just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Randomize