brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
