I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
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