If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
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