i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
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