Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
Randomize
