I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
Randomize
