Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
I texted him: “Come over for the Super Bowl. I promise lots of scoring.”
My divorce is turning into a porn script
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