I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
i woke up today to a handjob from this really fat girl that keeps calling me michael phelps
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Randomize
