I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
Randomize
