hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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