You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
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