Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
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