the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
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