How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Randomize
