I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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