can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Randomize
