but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
