Well douche your snatch and let's go!
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
Randomize
