I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
