We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
Randomize
