Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
where are you?
Hypothermia
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize
