xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
