Walk of Shame. In a state park.
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
Randomize
