I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Randomize