They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
Two words: blizzard sex
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
