I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
Randomize
